“Some changes look negative on the surface but you will soon realize that space is being created in your life for something new to emerge.”
― Eckhart Tolle
It’s graduation season – a time for change.
I was talking with a high school senior today who is delighted that tomorrow is her last day of high school. In the moment when she drives away from campus tomorrow, she will change. On the Sunday afternoon that she receives her diploma, she will change. When she moves into her dorm room in August at her intended college, she will change. She is excited about ALL of this change.
Some changes come in our lives that we don’t expect or that we do not welcome. Relationships end, companies close, romantic partners meet someone who is a better match. The bottom line is that “Shift Happens”. Shift is constant. We grow up, we move out, we marry, we have a family. Sometimes, we make career changes or move out again, we age, our parents age, we age some more and so on. I tend to look at change as good, even if it doesn’t feel or look like it is growth in the process. Somehow, I think that the older we get, the more difficult change can be to face.
How do you face change? How do you lift yourself up, brush yourself off and start all over again when change is a surprise?
I don’t usually fit two quotes into a post, but this one called to me and seems fitting for the topic… “Talk to the restlessness, Sit with confusion, Dance with paradoxes, and sip tea with the angel of life.” (J. Rupp, Dear Heart Come Home). Let’s break this down:
Talk to the restlessness – There is a dialogue that occurs in our heads during a time of change. Take time enough to listen to your thoughts, answer the questions you are asking yourself by writing responses on paper and pledge not to act hastily to dig your new foundation. Just “be” for a while. Make space.
Sit with confusion – Being confused can be like being in a maze. We don’t know which way to turn, which door to choose, to whom we should reach out or which emotions to validate. again. Do not hurry. If possible, allow for the confusion. You may benefit from finding a short-term solution to keep your life going in the right direction while you use the change at hand to truly reassess areas of your life or career that deserve contemplation. Make space.
Dance with paradoxes – The answers that lie in unexpected change often contain propositions that seems self-contradictory or absurd but in reality expresses a possible new way to approach something in your life. Consider paradoxes already at play in your life. give examples
Sip tea with the angel of life – Slowing down to just be and to converse with this lovely angel may provide a respite from the mind chatter and intensity that can create clutter in your mind. You may gain some interesting perspective and some gentle clarity.
When we learn to include the activities that J. Rupp recommends, we will likely make sound decisions – the sorts of decisions that we are glad we made years down the pike.
So, if you’ve got questions – take note of all of the spaces in your life where the answers may be hiding.
As always, I welcome your comments and make it a great week!
Destiny Rising, LLC